Is the Proof in the Pudding?

Is the proof in the pudding? If so, how can you tell? SPOILER ALERT! It is very possible to abstain from sex before marriage when you get into a relationship. Even if relationship gurus tell you to never marry someone without first testing the goods! By this logic and todays dating standards, that’s a lot of test driving for one person. I wish I could say that it is easy or that God will remove the desire while you wait on your special day, but that would not be my truth. Paul the Apostle had a gift lol ( 1 Corinthians 7:1-7).

I was not dealing with a gremlin. My hubby is tall dark and handsome. I mean, according to the Bible, I was crushing on the head of “The Mighty Men of Valor”. lol Yup, his name is David.

I have found that you may not get the full picture of God’s plan for your life all at once. God will drop little clues here and there or usher you in a certain direction for a specific outcome. God will sprinkle your proof in the pudding all along the way if you pay close attention. Its normally easier to see, after you look back on it though. By our flesh, we will try and piece something together to force it to work. Just think back over the years of your dating life and remember all the times you MADE it work. Even when that relationship was yelling at you to run from it, you stayed and made-do. A lot of times we compromise ourselves because we don’t want to be alone. We will accept someone’s dysfunction in our lives because, “Nobody’s perfect, right.” But when God puts something together, its so smooth. Things just fall into place.

After a few phone conversations following the week of Easter, I assumed the talks would become less and less and like before, eventually fizzle out. Except they didn’t. He began to call me on his lunch breaks and after he got off work. I started to feel those butterflies come back because I could tell he was thinking about me. This time he initiated most of the calls and if for some reason we couldn’t chat at that moment, he would ask me to give him a call back when I was free. But what about if he was busy? He would say, “Just call me and I’ll make time to talk to you.”  I almost went back to my old ways and melted right there on the phone. Nah sis! Get it together! You guys are just friends! I am not going to try and make this anything more. He is just being nice. If it was something more than that, he would have to spell it out. No assuming. I needed to be convinced that there is something to be giddy about. I wanted more! I need that proof that’s in that pudding everyone keeps talking about.

As we talked, we realized we were on similar paths. I was searching for my first home, and he was in the market for a home as well. We would stay on the phone late at night searching for homes together. When I would find one that I wanted to go tour, he would pray with me over the phone that the Lord allowed me to settle on the right home. David prayed a hedge of protection over me and for me to have wisdom in choosing my home. He prayed that I would have the right realtor. That they looked out for me in the process and didn’t just put me in any old thing to get a commission. Did I mention he did all of this even though he lived in another state??? Yes! David lived in Tennessee at the time, and I was in Texas. I tried to convince myself this was just our friendship blossoming and that is all. I mean he is in another state. What type of relationship could I expect from that? “Ugh Whyyyyyyy God? Why bring him around now and he no longer lives in Texas. He’s saying all the right things but he’s sooooo faaaaaaaaaaar!”

This is hindsight, but I have found when a man is serious about you, he will make plans with you. There is a big difference from having plans FOR you and making plans WITH you. One will provide a bit more proof in the pudding. The other one is spoken with hands rubbed together and lustful eyes. Stay away from that one until you are married if you are trying to live right lol.

We would chat about our future and the vacations we wanted to go on. He would paint a picture of a beautiful and fun vacation and include me in the plans. “Would you bungee jump with me? Or what about sky diving? Maybe we could go Parasailing together.” He would ask all the questions and just allow my imagination to run wild. After a rough week of work or not finding the perfect house, I would find myself on the phone with him in a whole other country. The things he would describe us venturing out to do together, would always be something new and interesting. They were things we had never done before. He would describe candle lit dinners, and moonlit walks. There were descriptions of us on tropical beaches, or sailing the Caribbean. Sigh. Dreamy to say the least. After all that, when we would realize it was waaaay past our bedtimes, he would tell me to meet him in the Bahamas or Tahiti that night in my dreams. He would describe what he would be wearing so I was sure to spot him. I couldn’t wait to get to sleep lol!!!!

He surprised me one day and told me that when he got his house, he wanted me to come visit him. I said sure but if I get mine first, then you must come and visit me. He agreed. By this time, I was starting to wish and hope these talks would amount to something. I could feel my hopes getting up high. A girl can dream, right? What do you know? I found my starter home and closed on it by May of 2016? David was on a plane to Texas for a visit by July…